YABCB (Yet Another Breast Cancer Blog)

It started a couple of weeks ago when I went in for my annual mammogram (which was actually about 6 months late – I decided to do all this annual stuff in the summer between semesters). The tech was very nice (I’ve had some pretty surly techs in the past, it must be a tough job, having woman after woman come in to enjoy the pain and awkwardness of having her breasts squeezed between 2 pieces of plastic). She mentioned they had a new digital system which was clearer and sharper, and that the radiologist might see something and have me come back in for a closer look. So when that happened, I didn’t get too worried. We took the 2d set of films 4 days later, and he showed me the teeny calcifications, one set regular and the other set irregular, which was why he said I now needed a biopsy. But there was an 85% chance it was benign, so I shouldn’t worry too much. Then I had to sit down with a nurse, I guess, not sure what her role was, except to reassure me that the worst that could happen was that I’d have a lumpectomy, since it was so small and so early. This was Friday and they set up the biopsy for Monday. Several friends had had a similar biopsy with benign results, so I still wasn’t too worried – the statistics were on my side.

The biopsy shouldn’t have been a big deal. I lay face-down on a table that was bowed in the middle with a hole for my breast to droop through and get squeezed by their new fancy biopsy machine. The doc gave me a local anesthetic and then explained as he used the computer to get the needle pointed in the right direction, then reassured me that he would be sticking the needle in, not the machine that was holding my breast in place. It was very uncomfortable on my neck and back, though, and after my arm went numb and I started to pass out I realized I had been holding my whole body tense. The doc and the tech were so nice when I told them, he stopped and told me not to worry, she got me some ginger ale, and I said, let’s just get it done. It passed and it got done.

So I waited until the end of the week and still hadn’t heard so I called and they said the results hadn’t been transcribed so it would be Monday. So again I tried not to stress about it – had a nice visit with my brother Andy and his family who were in Ocean City for the weekend, along with my mom and my sister and spouse who’d come down from New Jersey.

Then when I called Monday they said they would fax it to my doctor’s office and I would need to make appt with her to find out the results. So I called the doctor’s office and left a message saying I would probably need an appointment, soon. Finally they called back and said yes please come in first thing in the morning. So that’s when I knew, because of course they would have just told me on the phone if it were benign. So the next morning I went in and got the official word that I had breast cancer. The rest of the day seemed kind of unreal. I am so grateful for my friends - emails, phone calls, and a couple of my best buddies met me for lunch and support (one of whom is just now recovering from having her own cancer-ridden thyroid removed!). And Ben and I have talked more in the past couple of days than we usually do in a week. We talk to the surgeon tomorrow.